Swedish Authorities Say, "Don't Try This At Home"

Still adorable and oh-so tasty.

The last time I blogged about the weird places research leads us, it was to the edible dormouse, a creature of big-eyed cuteness and, to the Romans, supreme tastiness. Today, it takes us to trying to split an atom at home.

Cranky Rah was not trying to split an atom at home. Cranky Rah was simply learning about how neutrons split apart from protons so she could work it into a metaphor about twins (which sounds weirder than it comes off in the book, I promise). Anyway, what I ran into was this article about this pretty crazy Swedish guy who collected a bunch of radium, americium and uranium and tried to cook them up in sulphuric acid on his stove top as a kind of mini nuclear reactor. Because he was, you know, curious.

What kills me is how he'd been working on this (and blogging about it) for some time before it occurred to him that it might be illegal. He politely contacted the Swedish Radiation Safety Authority and they, needless to say, responded in person.

Friends don't let friends go to
dinner dressed like this.

Now, seriously, don't do this. And in case you have a burning desire to try it (probably because someone just told you not to), this post from Live Science will hopefully convince you that

1. It's pretty hard for normal people, and even evil despots, to get the materials one needs to split an atom in one's kitchen, and
2. That even if you were able to get your hands on the appropriate radioactive elements and even if you were able to cook up some uranium 235 next to your Keurig, you wouldn't be around to see the atoms splitting because you would be deader than an edible dormouse at a Roman feast. And probably about as crunchy.

All this talk about radium reminds me of the fabulous song Marie Curie by the Deedle Deedle Dees. And if that's not enough quirky historical wonderfulness set to music for you, listen to their song about Abigail Adams.